(Disclaimer: if personal oversharing – and particularly family planning- is not what you want to read about right now, then I’d advise that this post is not for you! Thanks for stopping by x )

So, I’ve always loved cake. 

Cake is joy. Cake is pure. Cake is the future.

As a very little girl, all I wanted to do when I grew up was to bake my own cakes- and lots of them. Thankfully, however, as childhood gave way to adolescence, I discovered that there was much more to life than hanging around the kitchen. I mean, I still loved cake, of course; but instead of dreaming up my own creations, I began to set my sights on working with cake; travelling the world, having fun and learning to contribute to the development of other people’s showstoppers. It was a beautiful adventure indeed.

Then… Well, then I met Husband. He was a fellow cake-worker, adventurer and lover of life; a partner in all things good and absolutely, definitely the type with whom I’d love to open a bakery, if you know what I’m saying! Once engaged, we talked of starting this venture at some point in the future; but both agreed that there was still so much more of the world left to see. The thought was exciting, but a long way off. A long, loooong way off… 

For about a year. 

Then… well then, settled into a loving home with such an obviously decent cook, it was shocking how quickly the desire to start home-baking overtook! I started the campaign, but money was tight. I was training in professional cake-raising, so the timing just wasn’t right. But I longed and I yearned and I imagined my brood. (And there’s just no going back once you’re dreaming of food!)

So… imagine my delight, when I finally landed a full time job with proper baking rights?! When Husband found work that actually paid, and when we both felt ready and excited to get on our marks, get set and baaaake! 

And then… Well, imagine our frustration when, after the exciting start; it turned out it wasn’t anywhere near as easy as those kitchen experts would impart?! (Seriously, Jamie ‘5-Cakes’ Oliver, what’s the cheffing deal?!)

I mean, at first we just chucked the ingredients in the oven (as so many do), and expected (as it goes on TV), that a perfect bun would pop out soon. Failing that, we turned to the recipe books; and then the oven manual too; followed by catalogues of weird kitchen equipment, (apparently there’s all sorts you can do!). Ah yes, we tried all manner and methods for baking; as a once romantic hobby became a serious undertaking. Yes, we cracked in the morning, whisked in the evening and even spooned in the afternoon; there was mixing in the lounge, kneading on the stairs, and even blending in the bathroom! Folding this way, stirring that way and setting upside down. No matter how we put it in the oven, however, at the end of each month the ingredients just slopped back out. Uncooked, unrisen and depressingly raw; month by month, we just didn’t produce the kind of results we were hoping for!

Impatient, and now convinced that my oven just wasn’t hot; we started to consider raising discarded cakes- of which, sadly, there are alot. Unfortunately, however, our kitchen simply wasn’t appropriate for such treats – as it turns out that gathering others’ leftovers can be just as hard a feat. So finally, we took it to the creator; the ultimate baker; and asked which He’d have us do? I presented my oven, my job and my house and asked for something, anything, new! 

Long and short of it? Soon after, we were gazing through the oven door at one perfectly rising cake; in complete and utter disbelief- and gratitude- that we’d finally managed to bake!

Following this most glorious creation, we found ourselves blessed once again. Yes, the recipe books came back out but- thankfully– there wasn’t half the expected strain! In the midst of all this I also became obsessed with others’ dodgy ovens; committing to pray, every day, until they also raised such good ‘uns. I’m still hoping on one or two, but there have been some beautiful results; as I’ve found myself almost just as floored and as thrilled, baking in prayer, but not for us.

So it’s been a journey and a half, to our -and a few others’!– homemade family.

So imagine now, how unbelievable (and, perhaps, even ridiculous?!) this next part of our story sounds to me…

As one’s dyslexic Husband hands in his final dissertation; thoughts of baking far behind, we head out in celebration. We eat and drink in moderation, until we reach a bar; where the doorman looks us up and down and asks... how old we are?! We look so thrilled, he soon realises we shouldn’t need ID. We bounce up and down with joyful squeals: “we’re 32 and 33!!!” His disbelief continues and he’s downright made our night, (apart from the fact we’re now at the age where this causes such delight!). So the party gets a little out of hand- no details required! But let’s just say there’s sugar everywhere;  Mary Berry would be fired!

A one off; a laugh; like we’re really 25… One final dance before the big move and that massive change for life.

Just imagine, with history, then… “there must be some mistake?!”… when the kitchen feels hot and the air smells alot like … Well… Like someone is on the bake?!!!

And then imagine my disbelief; overwhelming gratitude… and now, emotional state…

When eight short weeks later, we’re gazing through those oven doors again…

At one final, rising, undeserved and surprising,  beautifully blessed…

Cake!

– Due Jan/Feb 2018 🙂 

♡ Thanks be to God! ♡

                              * * * * * * 
* For those who found this message too subliminal… basically, we have another bun in the oven!

** For those who would prefer the original testimony to motherhood without the gimmicks… Read here.

*** And finally, to those still locked in the frustrating pursuit of the first bake… I’m sorry for what you are going through and even sorrier if this story aches. However, although I don’t know what is going to happen, I can at least hope to treat the sting: and testify that the way your story plays out, isn’t always the way it begins! May God be with You, on every step; and may you and yours, adopted or borne, forever and always be blessed. Xxx